UPDATED: Alfa Stelvio QV claims Nürburgring lap record using heavily cut video

They claim their new SUV did 7m51.7s. That’s nearly 25s quicker than a 600kg heavier Range Rover SVR.

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But unfortunately, whoever edited the following video did a crappy job, so while the video adds up to exactly 7m51.7s of running, the car covers some sections twice and misses other sections completely.

In other words, it’s a fake video. Maybe, maybe the car did the laptime. But not on this video. So we have to trust a manufacturer that edits videos together.

Let me explain, click play and follow me down the rabbit hole…

Let’s start with the first cut; at 22s into the YouTube video the Stelvio QV is already outside, on the left-hand-side of the Nordschleife, nearly level with the 2km sign, about to turn-in to the fast right-hander. But then…

ADDED 3s!

The video “rewinds” to the first apex of the right hander, and the car drives down to the 2km sign all over again. 3 seconds in hand to the video editor, I can see he’s going to need to cut some out somewhere.

Then the next camera angle comes at 28 seconds, and it’s clearly in the right we call “hatzenbach bogen”. So watch the new purposefully oblique angle and you can still count the turns… at 37 seconds he’s clearly hitting the first apex of the double-right at the start of Hatzenbach.

At 46s he’s riding the kerbs of the last right before Hocheichen.

At 54s he’s on the kerb on the right-hand-side at Hocheichen… at 58s he’s clicking into 4th gear hitting the rumble strip on the exit, then…

CUT 4 SECONDS!

The Alfa has teleported 4 seconds down the road to the bridge at Quiddelbach! It gets worse, because if you want to see a REAL 7m50s lap, you need to watch this:

And you’ll notice that the little Civic Type-R has already reached the kerbs on the right by 42seconds into the video…

BY THIS POINT I DON’T EVEN KNOW IF I SHOULD CONTINUE?!

“I mean, it’s just disappointing, right? Do they think we’re stupid? Is this supposed to be an artistic interpretation of what a 7m51s lap should look like?”

Thank goodness, the quick camera angle changes stop, and the camera is on one angle until about 3minutes into the video, until the turning-in point for Wehrseifen. The laptimer reads 2m48s, (compared to 2m46s on the Honda, just to confuse you).

At 3m14s on the video, the driver is out of Wehrseifen and making the kink right to Breidscheid. He’s going to straighten up for the braking zone and turn left for the first apex… 3m19s first apex left… 3m24s second apex hit, turning right for ‘Ex-Muehle’…

3m29s… BOOM

CUT 5 SECONDS!

Nope, I’m not continuing. I’m not writing any more. Alfa Romeo, you are ridiculous for ever releasing this video. It’s a joke. If they really did the laptime, then this video undermines all the hard work of the engineers, the drivers, and everybody involved.

CLICK THIS LINK TO SEE FOR YOURSELF

 

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